’18.7.07: In Frankfurt Germany en route to East Africa. I am praying for a unity of heart, spirit, and purpose. It has already been extremely difficult trying to focus on what is occurring here and what I imagine to be happening at home. The Great Commandment tells us to love God and love neighbor. We love the intangible and the tangible, but we must always love the unseen before we minister to the ‘seen’. “A right disposition of the heart always precludes obedience in action.” ‘
So I began this journey divided:
‘divided between being home and being in the now’
‘divided with thoughts of what awaits me when I return and the needs of the people right in front of me’
‘divided at heart, with much of it far away from Africa’
Arriving in Uganda, we hit the ground hard visiting our first church partner immediately after landing at Entebbe. We are immersed in the familiar scene of orphans running and cheering as our van pulls into the church property. My heavy heart lightens and I am caught up in the current of joyful energy as our van stops, surrounded by children who are eagerly waiting to receive us. Their excitement is not over what we have brought -money, toys, goods- it is the gift of our presence with them; even if it is only for a little while.
Immediately a boy runs up to me and hugs me. Looking up he says, “I remember you! You are Michael! Do you remember me?” To begin with, how humbling it is to come half way around the world to a patch of dirt in Uganda and be greeted by a child whom you met once several months ago. I looked into his eyes and with all the honesty I could muster, I told him that I had not remembered his name but that I did remember his face.
‘O’ God how great you are! You know everything about me, things which I may never truly understand- but you do.
How great you are, that you know the most intimate details of my life, a life which you have crafted with graceful hands.
O’ God you have called me and know me by name.’
I know the boy was disappointed. For an instance, sadness passed over his eyes and was gone. Our embrace tempered the sorrow and we walked towards the church holding hands and smiling. In that sequence of humility, shame, the boys sorrow and our joy, my eyes were lifted towards God and I forgot about the chasm in my heart.
“O’ God, forgive me for taking my eyes from you and the blessings of your present Kingdom.
I have put my hand to the plow and looked back.
Yet, you have aligned my heart- not without pain- upon your inheritance: the children of the nations.
You discipline your sons because of your love. Father correct me when I stray and remember me for the good that I do.
Amen.’
No comments:
Post a Comment